PORTAL!! I so hate youuuuuuuuuu!!!

HI!!! I’m baaaaaaaack!!! again… hahaha! We have just landed at the most boring blogsite in the world… hannah pacific air welcomes you to hell.. time check for you convenience…It’s 3o minutes past the hour of 5 in the morning and my day is already ruined. Darn! I can’t open our crew portal.. how am I supposed to know my flight today??? arggghhh!!! It’s the first day of June and it’s really a bad way to start the month.. huhuh !! MA (a.k.a. missed assignment) i don’t want to get one.. shhheeesshh!! what’s wrong with the portal???? (rolling on the floor) 

This portal is really getting on my nerves.. huhuh! I should have saved the excel format of my schedule.. but how am I supposed to know that this freakin’ portal is a moron??? damn…. i don’t know what to do… might as well die.. .(OA…..hihihi!)

 Anyway, i miss Davao… can’t wait to go home on June 4… *excited*

Barney Bey-beh!!!

This is my first nonsensical blog of the year.. a blog about Barney.. the oh so vayulet dinosaur. ahaha!! LMAO! Anyway, i was supposed to make a blog out of this a month ago, but due to my very busy and crappy social life I never had the time. Oh well… the idea came to me when a friend of mine, Markuz or should I call him Ngetz sang a song of Barney… the song goes like this…

 I love you… You love me

We’re a happy family

With a shotgun bang! bang! Barney on the floor…

No more bayot (gay) dinosaur!

Hahahaha!!Ngetz is really effin’ heteromorphic or should I say…ABNORMAL! We’ve been laughing for hours because of that song and whenever I remember that night I still can’t stop myself from laughing. It’s hilarious.. seriously! What’s crazy is… after 2 weeks… here comes the “BARNEY BILLBOARD” LMAO! When I saw this billboard along J.P Laurel I could die from laughing!

The song still lingers and every once in awhile I’m a having a LSS (last song syndrome) with that stupid song on my mind. O well… that’s it! Don’t come barking at me that this post is oh so nonesense… I warned you… hihihihi!!

 (this is the result of boredom and not having a thing to do on New Year’s Day! Kill me effin’ faggots!)

two O O eight.. a year of unstable psychological state!

This is the last day of the year..weeeeeeee! I would really celebrate the coming of 2009 with a bang! (no firecrackers and fireworks though.. it’s banned here in DAVAO CITY!) Why? Because I hate 2008 and i am more than ecstatic that this year is coming to an end.

You may ask again why I hate 2008 though many believed (take note: many BELIEVED) that this year is a LUCKY year… but it is sooooooooo not! If  you have been an avid fan of news on tv or newspaper you would know why. Remember the frontpage and headlines? It’s all about problems… and more problems… nothing but problems…  The economy is this and that… president blah blah is about to be impeached… a general choo-choo is corrupt… the price of this stuff is going to increase… arrrgghhh!! too much chaos for a not-so-lucky year eh?

But im not gonna rant about the ECONOMIC PROBLEMS OF THE PHILIPPINES here… not here…haha! I  got problems of my own and its a truckload of foppish predicaments. Many people said that it’s gonna be a lucky year for me since my birthday was last august 08, 2008.. 08-08-08.. lucky numbers for Chinese! (but hey! i’m not a chinese so maybe that’s why it’s still not lucky for me… haha! silly idea!)  Still.. this year has been a real hell for me, for the fact that many “pang-maalaala-mo-kaya- events” had happened. Memoirs that should never happend but again.. im not gonna fume out all those anamnesis or else, this blog would be a whole-day sitter for my readers (hahaha! see how disillusioned i am? readers?? who’s reading my blogs anyway?) But if anybody is interested and would really insist that i should objurgate the entirety of my preposterous life in 2008 then we should babble and gabble about it over a bottle of beer… ooopss!! rather over a cup of coffee. 

 Anyhoo… 2009 is near and i should make a new year’s resolultion ayt? I bet if i make one it would be a long list of overt and vacuous ideas, so might as well not make one. Well… im just happy that 2008 is going to be over SOON.. less than 12 hours is left before 2009 and i’m not going to celebrate it with my family since i’ll be on duty at the hospital taking care of my-not-so-normal patients and argue with toxic watchers..just another day’s work in the life of a purblind nurse. hihihihi! HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!

 P.S.

oh by the way… my co-worker just sent an SMS… we have seven patients and one is DNR (do not resuscitate) hahaha!! this is exciting…  a post-mortem duty on new year’s eve…of course if the patient decides to leave this moronic world.. 

tHE LAUNCHING….

Ho! Ho! Ho! Christmas is fast approaching… gifts eh?! I’ll wait for those… ayt?? hihihih!! Anyway, as always, I’m still single and alive… Nothing much have changed except for the fact that I now work 40 hours a week… got new friends… and of course… still STUPID! *Ouch* I became my worst nightmare… duh! Who cares?!

As much as I want to stay the same old me… I upgraded… rather, downgraded into a hebetudinous, sluggish, stupurous, torpid idiot. Hahahah! (What a harsh thing to say)

How? I erased my two friendster accounts!! Boo hoo! ( A dimwit is born!!) Nevertheless, don’t ask the reason why, I just did. OK??? Nonetheless, I created a new account… (hahaha! Wait for me to add u..oki?)

Due to a demand made by the reborn moron… I was prompted to update my blogsite because it was getting really boring as claimed, which I find true enough to make me jumpstart and write this another imbecilic blog. First and foremost, I revamped my site. New skin… I guess… (Pink is the color para kikay!) hahaha! and because I got really green-eyed over Janus’ so-called screen name a.k.a. REBORN MORON, I stipulated to also make one, of course with the help of the moron.. hahaha! and after an hour of contemplative, deliberative, excogitative thinking, we came up with DISILLUSIONED B.A.R.B.I.E.

well… we find it horribly fine and dandy. LMAO! Why B.A.R.B.I.E.? I don’t know… I just like the name… or maybe because I like how Barbie can be so beautiful but pretty ugly and dumb in many ways… (Just watch the Barbie cartoon series! Oh so kababawan!) Even so, I’m like her, always waiting for her prince charming to come and rescue her from the villains and witches in her life. (love freak)

I really don’t know how to end this blog… so… just let me say.. MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR! HAHAHAH!

CheerS!!

Whew!! Its been months since I last updated my blogsite with my own works.. anyway… here’s the thing.. remember months ago when I was totally down and depressed?? well.. it’s history now.. I’ve totally moved on (a toast for me! weee!!) I’m pretty much happier and contented with what I have right now. A good job that keeps me busy, a loving family and of course…a very special person who has a very special place in my heart.. who? hmmm… let’s keep that a secret for now.. i don’t wanna jinx it! hehe! To put it simply… I”M HAPPY! Amazing? yeah! indeed!! I never thought I’ll get through the heartache and heartbreak but with my family and friends’ support I got through it all (a toast for my family and friends!) Of course, last but SO NOT the least. I thank God for everything…   

Well to you… yes you…you know who you are… i still thank you for everything (haha! so emo!) I’ve learned so much from you. I can’t deny that when we were together i was happy.. coz indeed i was very happy.. it just saddens me that we had to end it that way… still, i’m grateful that i have met you and i pray that you’ll have all the best things in life.. ( actually you already do.. you just have to see those things… they’re already right infront of you.. you’re blessed and you should see that… )  

To my friends… a big THANK YOU for you guys!! I know its really deafening to hear my sentiments still you listened… ( wow! so drama na ito! this is supposed to be a “happy-mood-blog” ) 

To my family… I SOOOOOOO LOVE YOU!!  I know its hard to understand me.. still you tried and you never failed to catch me everytime i fall to the ground (haha!! nadagma) You’ve been there, through my stupidity and craziness… 

Gosh! this is really getting serious… hahah! well, let’s just cut the crap.. i’m having goosebumps already… hahah!! I’m already getting jaded with all the drama in life..sooo….. cheers to all the bitches and assholes… may you all rot in hell! OOOOPPPSS!! Sorry.. wrong sentence.. ( am i getting better or bitter??!! ) bitter? nyahaha!! no way!  not a bit… heheheh!! peace ya’ol! cheerios gotta go!! till my next blog… c yah!! 

FEATURED BLOG: by leslie anne gierran (The Hard Things on Love and Men)

1.   A man won’t let go if he really loves you.

Do not hold on to someone who has let go of you.  He does not love you and does not value having you.  Believe me, he will not let go if he really loves you.  There is another reason he is not willing to tell.

2.   Do not look for reasons why he ended the relationship.

There is only one reason why he ended your relationship.  He just does not love you.  Do not waste your time thinking of reasons or what you should have done.  Move on and be open to a man who will truly love you.

3.   Do not get hung up on your past.

Do not nag or distrust your current boyfriend just because your ex hurt you.  Do not treat him or the relationship the same way.  Do not compare.  He will not react the same way as your ex.  Do not be worried that your simple mistakes will cause him to look for another girl.  What happened with your ex was not your fault.  It was not because you didn’t guard him enough or you didn’t make him happy enough.

4.   Do not look into images.

How many times have you met a girl who didn’t have the best image in school or at the office, but you get to know the girl and found out she was actually extremely nice?  Do not rely on images.  Oftentimes, it is far from reality.  Do not fear men just because your “supposedly” perfect ex-boyfriend mistreated you.

5.   Always have your own set of rules.

Set your limits on how far you’d go for a guy.  It’s perfectly ok to give and do everything as long as it’s worth it.  And it’s worth it if the guy is treating you right.

6.   Do not be scared to lose him.

Don’t be scared that he’ll break up with you.  Once you are afraid of losing him, you easily can be taken advantage.  Be strong and if something is unacceptable, do not accept it and speak up.

7.   Avoid calling your guy.

It’s a guy thing.  The relationship will definitely be better if it’s the guy who’s calling, not the girl.  He will get tired of you if you keep on calling.  He will lose interest and challenge.  More so, he will get annoyed.  But it’s a girl thing also that your fingers get too itchy until you dial his number.  But avoid as much as possible.  Call only if really needed (like checking if your suspicions are reasonable).

8.   There is a guy who will value you.

There is a guy out there who can make you feel valued, appreciated, and loved.  And I mean, not just during your first few weeks together.  So don’t lose hope.  Don’t settle for a lesbian if you are not attracted to women.  There is a man out there who can love you like a girl can.

Also, do not believe him when he says it’s just the way he really is.  He’s not the sweet or expressive-type.  Remember during your first few weeks together?  Where has that sweet guy gone?  He simply is not that into you anymore.

9.   Always be the only one, no matter what.

Do not ever fall for a guy who has another girl, be it his wife, girlfriend, or any girl that he says he just can’t get rid of for whatever reason.  If you truly believe that he loves you and for some reason, he can’t leave or let go of another girl, then you are no different from any ordinary mistress.

10.   He must respect you.

No matter how long the relationship has been, he should always show respect towards you.

11.   If he fooled you, end it.

Philandering once is enough.  You can never trust nor respect the person again.

12.   Never start a relationship the wrong way.

Do not steal another girl’s man, for whatever reason.  Nor should you enter a relationship for the wrong reasons (loneliness, on the rebound, getting back at your ex, man-dependency, etc.) it is bound not to last.  You will only end up wasting more years of your life.

13.   Do not force yourself into a relationship.

Do not get into a relationship just because your friends are getting impatient with your dating escapades and the one hasn’t come yet.  Do not choose who to say yes to based on superficial things like money, looks, cars, etc..  If you are even thinking of these things, you have not fallen in love yet.

14.   Do not settle.

If you are not happy anymore with your relationship, break up instantly.  He will not stay with you forever no matter how upright he might seem to be.  Eventually, he will also want love and happiness in his life.

15.   A relationship has to have love.

Love is the only thing that will push you to give your efforts into making the relationship work.  And believe me, keeping a relationship requires genuine efforts of both parties.

16.   Don’t be afraid to be single.

It’s fun to be single, try it.  You can go out whenever and wherever you want.  You are free.  You can date whomever you want and you get to go out for free!  Do not get a boyfriend just for the sake of having one.  Do not settle.

17.   Be a good girl.

Be a good girl to attract a good guy.  Enter the relationship with sincere intentions.  Take the guy and the relationship seriously with the plan of spending the rest of your life with that person (of course, this is after you had your bit of fun in your younger years).  If you compare your flings from your real relationships, you will know that the latter makes you happier and more fulfilled.

18.   Love without limits.

Whether you loved and gave everything or loved but held out for some things, if the relationship ends, you still get hurt.  But if you gave your everything, you were happy and you could say that it was worth it.  If you didn’t give your all, you get hurt for nothing.

19.   You will get over him.

Love is over-stated.  Love eventually ends and you are free to love another.

20.   Be the one.

Act like you are the one.  Don’t be a nagger.  Don’t hinder his gimmicks.  Don’t give in to him too easily.  Make him treat you as important.  Don’t be easy.  Don’t be like every other girl he had in his life.

EARLY Morn’ MADNESs

 It’s already 3:50 in the morning… i can’t sleep.. huhu!! just finished eating my early morning breakfast.. hehe!! I ate Mcmuffin, large coke, 2 large fries and an epol pie.. hahah! (certified McDonald’s Freak ‘O) Yum Yum!!

Actually i got nothing to say.. just want to show everybody how big my appetite is right now. Maybe because of sleep deprivation (y’know.. the 14 habits…) hahaha!! nwei, cheerios! gotta force myself to sleep.. . i don’t want to doze off during our church service (like what happened last sunday!) bwahahah!

EXTRA! EXTRA! 14 HABITS THAT CAN MAKE YOU FAT!!!

TV Watching

Prolonged TV watching is a strong predictor for obesity1. Recent research2 has proved that people who watch around two hours of TV per day are much more likely to be overweight than those who watched only half an hour per day. When you watch TV you are virtually motionless. Your heart rate, blood pressure and metabolic rate decline, resulting in burning 20 to 30 calories less per hour. Research by Harvard University4 has shown that there is a link between the amount children eat and the amount of television they watch.

Eating Too Fast

It is a habit of most people living in a fast paced society. Eating fast lets you eat too much before you are fully aware of it. It takes the brain about 15-20 minutes to start signaling feelings of fullness. Scientists suppose that fast eating is a risk factor for the metabolic syndrome3, a combination of the symptoms such as high blood pressure, obesity, high cholesterol, and insulin resistance.

Task Snacking

Task snacking refers to eating while doing other activities. if you often eat meals or snacks while working by yourself in front of your computer, while driving, watching TV, or standing at the kitchen counter, shopping with a friend, or talking on the phone, it’s likely that the “task snacking” eating style is increasing your odds of becoming overweight or obese.

Frequent Fast Food Consumption

One of the big reasons we’re seeing more obesity in our society these days is that we are too stressed and busy to make healthy dinners at home, often opting to get fast food at the nearest drive-thru instead. Fast foods compromise the quality of the diet by replacing more healthy foods. Fast foods are known for having high content of saturated and trans-fat, low content of fiber and massive portion sizes, which leads to obesity.

Eating To Manage Feelings

Emotional eating is the practice of consuming large quantities of food (usually “comfort” or junk foods) in response to feelings (such as depression, anxiety, or loneliness) instead of hunger.

Experts estimate that 75% of overeating is caused by emotions. How many times have you found yourself scouring the kitchen for a snack, or absently munching on junk food when you’re stressed, but not really hungry?

Too Busy To Exercise

With all the demands on your schedule, exercise may be one of the last things on your to-do list. If so, you’re not alone. Americans live a more sedentary lifestyle than we have in past generations, yet our minds seem to be racing from everything we have to do. Unfortunately, from sitting in traffic, clocking hours at our desks, and plopping in front of the TV in exhaustion at the end of the day, exercise often goes by the wayside.

Your Friends Can Make You Fat

If you’re putting on weight, you might want to take a look at who you’re hanging around with. A study7 published in the July 26, 2007 edition of the New England Journal of Medicine suggests that obesity may be “socially contagious.” The study was conducted on more than 12,000 people over 32 years, and concluded that having an overweight friend, sibling or spouse increased one’s risk of obesity by 37 to 57 percent.

Lack Of Sleep

Sleep deprivation can increase your risk of obesity by boosting ghrelin (an appetite stimulating hormone) and lowering leptin (an appetite suppressor). The study5 from the University of Bristol in the United Kingdom found that, compared to an eight hours of shut-eye, each one-hour decrease in sleep duration was linked to almost 3% more body fat.

Unaware Of Calories And Fat

Many people eat foods with no idea of the calorie or fat value. This leads to weight gain and unhealthy eating habits because you can easily consume twice the normal calories required to maintain your weight, let alone lose weight, if you don’t know how many calories you are eating.

Credit Cards

Your plastic may be affecting more than just your credit score. Visa conducted a study of 100,000 fast-food restaurant transactions and found that people who pay for their food with a credit card spend 30% more than those who pay with cash. For the average woman, who visits a fast-food restaurant once a week, that adds an extra 17,160 calories, or 4.9 pounds, per year.

Missing Meals

Research shows that people who eat breakfast are less likely to be overweight, and that morning meals seem to help those who’ve lost weight keep it off. Denise Bruner, MD, obesity specialist and former president of the American Society of Bariatric Physicians, says that skipping meals of any kind results in a “tremendous bout of compensatory hunger.”

Uncomfortable Clothing

Researchers from the University of Wisconsin, La Crosse6 found that casual and comfortable clothing workdays promote increased physical activity. Specifically, study participants took an average of 491 (or 8%) more steps on Jeans Day than on those days in which they wore normal business attire. It is also estimated that study participants burned an average of 25 additional calories on Jeans Day with the extra steps and miles walked. Wearing casual clothing every day for 50 weeks of work translates into burning an additional 125 calories per week and 6,250 calories per year.

Neglecting Scales

Recent study from the University of Minnesota found that dieters who weighed themselves daily lost about 12 pounds over two years, while those who never did shed only four pounds. Other research, published in The New England Journal of Medicine, concluded that those who have daily weigh-ins (along with face-to-face support) are 82% less likely to regain five pounds than a control group without weigh-ins or support.

Boredom

A survey by the Priory Group in the U.K. found that more people ate when bored than when stressed.  

I find all of these reasons really amusing!! What’s weird is.. i think i did all of them.. but what d’ heck.. i’m still not gaining any weight! PLease.. stop me!! hahaha!! Maybe true for some people but not for me.. ehehe! lucky me?? so not!! I WANNA GAIN WEIGHT!! I look like anorexic or what! I do binge eating but i dont barf it out (like all bulimics do) and i still don’t gain any weight!

i do watch tv.. uhmm.. yah i do.. I watch korean flicks with my mum.. haha! stil.. no weight gain..

I also eat fast..way too fast! hahah!

task snacking??? definitely.. i even eat while im pooping!! nah!! just joking!

Frequent Fastfood Consumption… Oh hail to MCdonalds!!!! Double cheeseburger with large fries and coke PLUS sundae hotfudge!!

 Eating to Manage Feelings!! uhmm..maybe i slacked on this.. hahah! cause i got hypoglycemic over some STUPID matters.. love matters by d way..  geeezz!! wat a loser am i.. NOT!!

Yeah.. i’m too busy to exercise.. i sit in front of my computer 24 hrs a day seven days a week.. imagine?? do you still ask me if i’m busy?? do the math dopey!

 Your Friends Can Make You Fat  hahahahha!! i dont think so.. we are oh so sexy people!! yeah.. baby! watawiwit!

Lack of sleep! YOu hit the jackpot beybeh!! yeah! 3hrs of sleep everyday.. super lack of sleep don’t yah think??

Unaware Of Calories And Fat .. oh come on man!! do i have to know the calorie and fat content of every food that im going to eat??! do i look like a nutritionist or dietician or CRAZY???!!

Credit Cards!!!!   how i wsih i could have one.. again!! but then never mind.. so tempting to buy all those freakin’ shirts, tops, pants,accessories, FOOD, FOOD, FOOD.. hahah!! need i say more?

 Missing Meals  gosh… missing meals can make you fat?? i cant do this.. please.. your torturing my soul..and of course… my lovable stomach.. <— loves food!! haha!

Uncomfortable Clothing??? what does that have to do with gaining weight? People are really silly.. they make up silly reasons..

Neglecting Scales  yadi da-di-da!! whatever!! scales.. they never loved me.. haha!

Lat but not the least….. tada!!! BOREDOM!!

i am so bored……that’s why i’m wrting this blog… i think i gained 1 pound for this.. i hope so.. hahaha!! That’ all folks!! cheerios gotta go!!

DEAR KEVER! hahaha!!

Dear Kever.

I don’t really know how to tell you this, but you’re a pervert

I think I realized it When I saw the shrunken head at the mental hospital 

and I saw you hit on donald duck

I’m sure you’re mongolic enough to understand How boring you are
I’m returning Your ring to you, but I’ll keep My virginity as a memory.

You should also know that I never openly mocked cocaine abuse

Good luck on your short-term leave from jail,

Hannah =)

Do it like this:
Dear (the person who last texted/smsed you).

I don’t really know how to tell you this, but ___1___.

I think I realized it ____2____ ____3____ and I saw you ___4___ ___5___.

I’m sure you’re ___6___ enough to understand ___7___.

I’m returning ___8___ to you, but I’ll keep ___9___ as a memory.

You should also know that I ___10___ ___11___.

___12___,
-Your name-

1. What’s the color of your shirt?
Blue - Our romance is over
Red - Our affair is over
White - I’ll join the monastery
Black - I dislike you
Green - Our horoscope doesn’t match
Grey - You’re a pervert
Yellow - I’m selling myself
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - You’re a loser
Other - I’m inlove with your sister

2. Which is your birth month?
January - That night
February - Last year
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on sesame seeds
May - First of May
June - When you put cuffs on me
July - When I threw up
August - When I saw the shrunken head
September - When we skinny dipped
October - When I quoted Santa
November - When your dog ran amok
December - When I changed tennis shoes

3. Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Pizza - In your camping car
Pasta - Outside of Chicago
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad - As you ate enchilada
Chicken - In your closet
Kebab - With Paris Hilton
Fish - In women’s clothing
Sandwiches - At the Hare Krishna graduation
Lasagna - At the mental hospital
Hot dog - Under a state of trance
Annat; With George Bush and his wife

4. What’s the color of your socks?
Yellow - Hit on
Red - Insult
Black - Ignore
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - Put leeches on
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the toupee off
Barefoot - Sit at
Other - Drive out

5. What’s the color of your underwear?
Black - My best friend
White - My father
Grey - Bill Clinton
Brown - My fart balloon
Purple - My mustard soufflé
Red - Donald Duck
Blue - My avocado plant
Yellow - My penpal in Ghana
Orange - My Kid Rock-collection
Pink - Manchester United’s goalkeeper
None - My John F. Kennedy-statue
Other - The crazy monk

6. What do you prefer to watch on TV?
Scrubs; Man
O.C.; Emotional
One Tree Hill; Open
Heroes; Frostbitten
Lost; High
House; Scarred
Simpsons; Cowardly
The news; Mongolic
Idol; Masochistic
Family Guy; Senile
Top Model; Middle-class
Annat; Ashamed

7. Your mood right now?
Happy - How awful I’ve felt
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That Santa doesn’t exist
Angry - That your pimples are at the last stage
Depressed - That we’re cousins
Excited - That there is no solution to this.
Nervous - The middle-east
Worried - That your Honda sucks
Apathetic - That I did a sex-change
Ashamed - That I’m allergic to your hamster
Cuddly - That I get turned on by garbage men
Overjoyous - That I’m open
Other - That Extreme Home Makeover sucks

8. What’s the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Your ring
Yellow - Your love letters
Red - Your Darth Vader-poster
Black - Your tame stone
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - The pictures from LA
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your contact book
Grey - Our matching snoopy-bibs
Purple - Your old lottery coupons
Pink - The cut toenails
Other - Your memories from the military service

9. The first letter of your first name?
A/B - Your photo
C/D - The oil stocks
E/F - Your neighbour Martin
G/H - My virginity
I/J - The results of your blood-sample
K/L - Your left ear
M/N - Your suicide note
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your collection of butterflies
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X - David’s tricot outfits
Y/Z - Your grades from college

10. The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Always will remember
C/D - Never will forget
E/F - Always wanted to break
G/H - Never openly mocked
I/J - Always have felt dirty before
K/L - Will tell the authorities about
M/N - Told in my confession today about
O/P - Was interviewed by the Times about
Q/R - Told my psychiatrist about
S/T - Get sick when I think of
U/V - Always will try to forget
W/X - Am better off without
Y/Z - Never liked

11. What do you prefer to drink?
Water- Our friendship
Beer - Senility
Soft drink - A new life as a clone
Soda - The incarnation as an eskimo
Milk - The apartment building
Wine - Cocaine abuse
Cider - A passionate interest for mice
Juice - Oprah Winfrey imitations
Mineral water - Embarrassing rash
Hot chocolate - Eggplant-fetishism
Whisky - To ruin the second world war
Other - To hate the Boston Celtics

12. To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand - Warm regards
USA - Best regards
England - Good luck on your short-term leave from jail
Spain - Go and drown yourself
China - Disgusting regards
Germany - With ease
Japan - Go burn
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
Australia - Greetings to your frog Leonard
Egypt - Fuck off now
France - In pain
Other - Greetings to your freaky family

My Spaceman

My Spaceman

She was in her early twenties, a registered nurse, and a single mom of an adorable 2 year old boy. Her friends call her Susie, short for her name Susan .For the record, it was her mother’s wish to call her by that name since she was a big fan of a renowned actress, Susan Roces.

Her boyfriend is also in his early twenties, an outgoing and fun-loving guy. An average looking guy but was attractive enough to swept Susie off her feet. He is a member of a local band and a pretty good player of guitar and keyboards. Everyone calls him Ando, but his real name is Fernando Climaco.

They’ve been steady for a year or so, and they never had any argument that wasn’t resolved before sundown. Their relationship was not the ideal one, but they manage to get by. What Susie didn’t know is Ando has a secret. Everything was going smoothly before Susie left for Manila to take an exam, but everything changed when she came back…

His heart was racing the moment she saw Susie enter the pizza house. His hands started to sweat as Susan started to approach the table. He is out on a limb already, he couldn’t think of any excuse anymore. He was already on pins and needles. All he can do was wait and see what Susan is going to do…

“I need space!”  These three words kept on running through Susan’s mind as she was approaching Fernando’s table. The fight they had when she arrived kept on playing in her brain like it was a pirated DVD. It was like a never ending rerun. Her heart started to feel like it was being crushed. She wanted to believe what Fernando said. He just needed some space. A ceasefire from all the wars they had. But all the cards are laid right in front of her now, there’s no turning back. This is the answer to all the questions that’s been bombarding her for the past two weeks. Two weeks of no communication with Fernando. Two weeks of not knowing what went wrong. As soon as she reached the table to where Fernando was sitting, Susan immediately grabs a chair and sat down.

“What’s going on?!” Susan blurted out as her lips started to tremble from fear of what she’s going to hear. But no one answered. Right at the corner of her eye, she saw her. Afraid that a mere glance would fire up her insecurities, she didn’t look at her. She couldn’t dare to…She was already lost in her misery…

Corny

 Just when I was browsing my FS inbox, I manage to read this again.. anyway.. my happiness is so kababawan right now… heheh!! I had fun reading it!

"pinapaikot mo lang ako. Nagsasawa na ako. Mabuti pang patayin mo na lang ako"

-electric fan

"hindi lahat ng walang salawal ay bastos!"

-winnie d’ pooh

"Alam mo ba wala akong ibang hinangad kundi ang mapalapit sa iyo. pero patuloy ang pag-iwas mo"

-ipis

"Hala! sige magpakasasa ka!

Alam ko namang katawan ko lang ang habol mo."

-hipon

"Ayoko na! pag nagmamahal ako lagi na lang maraming tao ang nagagalit! wala ba akong karapatang magmahal?!?"

-gasolina

"Hindi lahat ng green ay masustansya. "

-plema

"Hindi ko hinahangad na ipagmalaki mo na ako’y sau ayoko ko lang naman na sa harap ng maraming tao

ganun mo na lang ako itanggi.."

-utot

"Sawang sawa na ako palagi nalang akong pinagpapasa-

pasahan, pagod na pagod na ako."

-Bola

"you never know what you have till you lose it. and once you lose it,you can never get it back"

-snatcher

"Hindi lahat ng pink, KIKAY!"

-majinboo

"Ginawa ko naman lahat para sumaya ka mahirap ba talagang makontento sa isa? bakit palipat-lipat ka?

-TV

"hindi lahat ng maasim may vitamin c"

-kili kili

Sige, batihin mo ako…. Sigeee…..BATEEEEE E!!!!!!!!

-omelette

pilitin mo man na alisin ako sa buhay mo, babalik at babalik ako!

-libag

Anung kasalanan ko sayo, iniwan m nalang akong duguan…

-Napkin

"wag mo na akong bilugin.."

-kulangot

Hindi lahat ng hinog, matamis

-pigsa

Paano tayo makakabuo kung hindi ako papatong sa iyo?

-Lego

Punyetang Buhay to! Itlog itlog! Araw2 na lang itlog!

-Brief

Wala naman akong ginawa sa kanya! Hindi na nga ako

gumalaw dito. Ako n nga yun ntapakan, sya pa un galit.. bakit ganun?

-Tae

Cge kalimutan mo ako para malaman ng iba ang baho mo!

-deodorant

"hindi lahat ng dugo puedeng idonate"

- regla

Puzzles…

Rihanna - Take A Bow

Here I am again.. still bitter and all but moving on.. Anyway i think i’m having a LSS (last song syndrome) i kept on singin’ Rihanna’s song entitled "Take a Bow".. It suits me well..  I’ve been an utter fool for such a long time but here i am closing the doors to something that should have never been opened. Anyway for anyone who doesn’t know the lyrics of the song, here it is.. 

How bout a round of applause?
Standin ovation…
Ooooh
Yeah yeah yeah yeah

But it’s over now…

NIce ain’t it?? I wonder how Ne-Yo composed all his songs? (oh by the way, ne-yo composed take a bow and let rihanna perform it) Is he heartbroken?? Enough with ne-yo and rihanna though. I’ve been thinking so hard lately that it made me realize that maybe love is like a puzzle.. it’s finding the right piece. The piece of puzzle that fits. When you try to fit a wrong piece you’ll only damage both pieces..ayt?? same with the two persons involved.. you’ll end up hurting each other. That’s it for now..  (if you wanna listen to the song i’ve uploaded it)

Disturbed, Incoherent, Disoriented

Wouldn’t it be nice if I or someone could invent a a brainwashing machine? Weeee!! That would be really nice. I could erase all the bad and hurtful events in my life.. I could sleep soundly and i wouldn’t have these BIG eyebags! Well the machine should look really nice when you wear it (i’m a fashionista..duh!) I wouldnt want the machine to look like an electric chair used to kill criminals (but how i wish i could use that to kill someone! hahah!) Anyway, back to the brainwashing machine,it can look like guess cap or even a gucci shades..Definitely no one would know that its a brainwashing machine (is brainwashing even a word or recgonized in the dictionary?? i dont know..i’m not a genius but i sure would want to be one)  Do i sound pathetic now?? yeah I do.. I desperately want to erase all the things that had happened recently. So traumatic and hurtful.. If i could just die from heartbeak. Well here’s my wish list.. Read on and  see how disturbed i am today..

How I wish I could..

1. Slit his throat open

2. Burn down ADDU

3. Smash his car

4. Rip his heart out and feed it to the rats

5. Dig the girl’s eyes out 

6. Throw a bomb inside the car while they’re in it

7. Serve them food with rat poison in it. (hmm..that gave me an idea..how about invent a cheater and bitch poison)

8. Have them live on CHEATERS.. (have you seen the show??)

9. Hit their brains with a hammer until it turns into a mushy ang gooey substance

10. well.. i just wish i could kill them..

Haha! I’m having flight of ideas again.. back to the brainwashing machiney.. ehhe! yeah.. i could erase all the events but can i erase the person in my heart????  

A glimpse of Hell

Urbandub - The Fight is Over

  Have you ever been in love?? I bet everyone did (except for those freakin’ idiots) Ghastly isn’t it? It makes you weak, defenseless and vulnerable. It opens up your chest and unwraps your heart that means someone can get inside and muddle you up. You put up all these barricades, you put on a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can friggin’ hurt you, then one stupid person came along.. no different from any other stupid person in this damned world. Then he saunters into your stupid and boring life. You gave them a part of you.. a piece of your heart because they did something dumb one day.. like smile at you.. took you on a date.. or kiss you, then your whole life changes and it isn’t yours anymore.. Your fragile heart is at the palm of their hands.. to maim or nurse. Love procures hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like “I need space” (mag astronaut ka??) –you want to be an astronaut??- turns into a glass splinter working its way inside your heart. It hurts!!! It hurts a lot.. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It’s a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart-pain. Then tell me.. should I be cynical and bitter towards love??